Day 4,084—the Stuff one Owns—

 

When I took this picture this morning, this small dog approached me and started yapping at me, which got the attention of a bigger dog that was next door. Then, they were both yapping at me so intense it seemed like they were going to charge at the fence, so they might jump on my face in their ferocity, “HOW DARE YOU TAKE A PICTUE OF THIS FLOWER!” I imagine them both saying.  

I like that my house isn’t that big, so it becomes difficult for me to own too much stuff, but right now I have an influx of things because I am starting a new job, so all the things that were on my desk previously are now in my basement. I also have a lot of new stuff that I plan to put in my new office. All this thinking about space and the time I devote to "things" made me consider all my hard drives over the years and what I have been holding onto regarding computer storage. I would like to keep some things seemingly forever, like my pictures and my writing, but it becomes an unmanageable amount of stuff, and part of me wonders what the point is of owning something you only look at once every ten years or owning things that you will never look at all. Some things I hold onto because of how much I paid for them at one time, or I might keep them because of what they meant to me at one time, but in reality, it is hard to know what you might reach back for later and want to experience again.

         I rarely reread books I own, but I still keep them. I own books I have never read, yet they still sit on my bookshelf. I own records I haven’t listened to in years and movies that collect dust. Yet, when I want a book that I don’t have, it makes me think, “I need to buy that book.” When I think of a movie I want to rewatch, I start looking for copies of it and debate buying it. All the movies I have purchased like this mostly just sit on my shelf and I don’t look at them, so what’s the point?

It is still hot, and I felt a little more energized today, pushing myself some, but at the same time thinking about all that I have still to do in my small house. In my small lawn that I struggle to maintain, and all the while I don’t want to do anything, I don’t want to own anything.

It makes me think of the basic principle that the more you have, the more you want, and the more you own, the more your things own you. How freeing it must be to live with less of everything, both physically and mentally. Even my computer hard drives seem to lose meaning over time, and I wonder why I keep them around. Is it just because of the security they gave me once?