Day 4,162—I See You: Running in the Darkness, Talking with your Mouth Closed, Ducking in the Shadows, Ain’t it Good to See You—

 

        Why didn’t I go to bed at 8:30, like I wanted? Instead, I ate a snow cone and watched TV.

        I am glad I got this run. Man, did I need it, but where was I running to? I have never done this loop before. The kids at my school are always on edge. They’re always throwing down, squaring off, and punching each other in the face. When I say “Good morning,” some of them snap at me and yell, “Don’t say good morning to me!” It doesn’t take them much to set them off. I’ll ask them why they’re fighting with someone else or what happened. They will explain that they had no choice because the other person bumped into them by accident, or maybe the other kid looked at them wrong.

        They probably want to fight me, too, for greeting them with a smile. How dare I?! How dare anyone be nice to them and say something friendly?!

They’re kids, so I am not mad at them, but it is frustrating. It is hard to know where to start when so many of the issues that they’re having are beyond me, beyond the building, beyond their home life, beyond the city, beyond the country. It is all of them together, mixed up and broken apart.