Day 4,385—Timing—

 

       When I was running this morning, I was once again living life in the freedom of not listening to anything but the birds and the trains, and spending time over on the trail by the seminary. I took a picture of a beehive that I hadn’t seen before, by the group of deer. I try desperately not to wake up in the morning, but there are always a couple who will run away when I approach them on the trail. I decided to sit and meditate for five minutes because it is much better to do it outside. As I sat there, trying to sit up straight with my head down, I heard the train pull away, so I looked over and realized I could see it from where I was sitting. I thought about how cool it must be to live here, where you’re surrounded by nature and a train yard. People who don’t live near trains, I am sure, think it is awful, and if you’re right next to one, it must be, but when you’re a good half mile to a mile away, it is just comforting to hear that sound of the train in the distance. I wondered why I had never seen anyone else running here in the morning, and then I saw someone today and said hi! It was like the universe read my mind and agreed with me.

       It has taken me all year to get my timing close to where it should be, but I think this week marks one of the few times when, each day, I am hitting almost all the things I want to do in the morning at the times I set for them! And it feels good. It feels like I have some control over what is happening. I don’t think I have realized how long I have been going back to school, but I was thinking about it this morning, and it has been five years! First year taking graduate classes in English, two years taking classes in clinical mental health counseling, and two years taking classes for school counseling. I wish I had three separate degrees, but I will end up with the coursework done for both school counseling and clinical health counseling. Sarah told me this week that she had envisioned that we would all go to my graduation together, and my kids would get to see me graduate, but I didn’t sign up to go to graduation, and she said it seemed like way too much work at this point, and I agreed with her. I think at some point in the next ten years I will want to get a doctorate degree, so maybe I will want to go to that graduation.